Things that I should not say. There are many. I am just pressing it in my heart. Burying it. Whenever I saw people happy, coupled people happy, I feel like why I didn't have a chance.
Oh God, this is crazy. Totally crazy!!! I mean it's been what, around more than 6 months I broke up. But the love, still smells good. It never died. God damn it!!! I dunno why. I am sick of it. Sometimes anger, sometimes smiles. I felt regret to love her. I really felt it, but then no, it was not regret. It was anger. God!!!
I thought I moved on. But, no, now I realized, I am still there. Like Bri said, I am just hiding it. Deep inside I am not ok. You are right, Bri.
I love her so much. It's like, God, I dunno how to say it. No matter what I did, I still remember her. God, I dunno why you put her in my life. I mean what is the reason?? To gimme a chance to feel the pure love?? No, pure love will never ever end like this. Why I am living in such a mess?? Don't tell me that I made the mess!!!
Is it wrong to love her so much?? Yea, may be you are angry coz I put her before you. Is it coz I love her more than I love you, God?? You know I can't live with or without her. So what you waiting for?? I am praying, God!!! I am praying!!! Please take my life. Coz it's obvious right?? It's a goddamn dead end. Nowhere to go now. Do you want me to wait for my last day?? Coz I am waiting!!!
I realized dying is easier than living. God, why you are taking innocent's life away and don't want to talk my life?? I am tired of this live. May be all this things are just temporary. But it will effect my future. Can't you see??
She spitting on me. She even bring her friend together. On the other hand, it's just ME!!! Hey God, you know it. I am ALL ALONE!!! I need you, seriously, I need you now. Don't turn your back now. Guide me. Hold my hand and drag me to the brighter side. I have the courage to make my life better. I want it too.
p.s.: You are the only, only thing in this world that matters to me. I am sorry to make you clean all the mess that I have done in your life, honey.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment