This is what happened. I know I didn't get over my ex fully. Can say mostly. But, when I was in a relationship with this girl, it was kinda healing. I was kinda more to her than my ex. I text her, sometimes call her, just to get the memories outta my head. Coz I wanna be loyal, I wanna be honest. I don't wanna think about my ex when I'm in a relationship with other girl. But then, when I don't get back anything form this girl, my heart started to bring back my old memories. This is where my past suck me into the hole again.
And now, when she started to blame herself, I told her the truth. Which is I didn't get over my ex fully. And now, the blame is on me again. All I wanted was to make you feel better, and this is what I get. I still care for you. We started as friends, we cared for each other. This is what I'm doing now. And she said my promises is bullshit and she allergic to that. The worst part is my ex liked the FB status. She just poked me that the right place. She knew my ex is my weakness. And she did that. I never thought you will do that.
Why am I in pain when it was your fault?? I was there for you, I wanted your attention, I wanted you to show me love, but I was all alone, all the time. This is where my past suck me back to the hole again. Your "I love you" should put me into sleep but the memories did that, your fingers should wipe my tears, but the memories did that. Is this my fault?? Please tell me, some one, please!!
I wish I was born without a heart. Much easier to get over my past and move on. Why does every time I like a girl, it reminds me of you?? It's reminding me that it's was a part of me and I might be that person again. I tired to accept the fact that you never gonna come back, it's just I can't.
p.s.: Everybody fall in love without knowing it's consequences. And I think it's not the way.
No comments:
Post a Comment